Showing posts with label same sex marriage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label same sex marriage. Show all posts

Wednesday, 27 March 2013

Of opening cans of worms and marriage equality


I’m going to open up a can of worms – I know it. I don’t know how else to begin this post other by saying some of you will be offended, some of you will think I’m wrong and some of you will think I’m disgusting for holding this opinion. And that’s fine. You are entitled to your opinion as much as I’m entitled to mine.

Today’s blog post is about an overwhelming topic in the media because of the United States’ court proceedings – gay marriage/marriage equality.

So as most of you know Prop 8 was brought before the court yesterday in a case that moves to legalize gay marriage (henceforth referred to as marriage, gettin’ hitched, tyin the knot or shackling oneself to the old ball and chain) which will be announced towards the end of June. Now this movement in government is having a profound effect in not only the US but in Canada as well. So many people that I know (and thankfully so) are large supporters of marriage, regardless of religion – I also know people who don’t agree with it personally but have the common decency to not allow their opinions to rule someone else’s life.

I think the entirety of having ONE religion dictate who and who cannot be married to be incredibly flawed. I realize that at the time that these laws were created we were living in a largely different era. This law made sense when women were considered subordinate to men and skin colour dictated your worth. So it is beyond me that in this day and age when women have assumed equal status to men (for the most part – but that’s a whole different can of worms) and race does not mean you’re worthless that sexuality dictates right to marriage.

I think my biggest issue with this entire argument is that we’re setting ourselves up to never have peace by being for and against. If you think about it, the issue of marriage, outside of religion, is just personal politics. We’re not arguing that all marriages be had in a religious church – just that they be recognized as a legal union by the government. I wonder then, if there is no religious component other than the personal beliefs of the individuals against it, why is it a religious issue? This way of getting married is the same way that those who are not married in a religious ceremony get hitched, so does that mean that their union is not legally binding as well? Why stop discriminating there? What about the transgendered, those with no gender? What about those who are not married under “God” in the traditional sense?

It bothers me so incredibly much that someone’s personal religion – a choice they made (you can chose to be a Catholic, Christian, Buddhist) trumps someone’s choice of who they marry even outside of the religious ceremony.  This assumes that every single human being falls under the same religious belief as you and that’s just not true. Religious diversity is huge and while it’s an intensely personal commitment with a higher power it has given way to the right to be intolerant to others. I cannot contest your relationship with your higher power because that is discrimination, however you can impose your relationship with a higher power on me and that is protecting the sanctity of marriage for everyone?  How can someone not see the incredible flaw in that logic?

This way of thinking always excludes someone and always leaves people in the wrong. Everyone has the right to choose how they live and as much as I may not agree with the way someone lives their life I respect they have the right to make their own choices. I don’t think people realize that respecting someone’s right to make a commitment to someone for their lives does not have to go against your religious beliefs. You can still believe that marriage should be between a man and a woman based on your religion AND respect someone’s ability to have the same LEGAL rights in a union.  

Why? How? Whaaaaaat?

They are not getting married under the same conditions as you. Simple as that.

It’s time that people stop being personally offended when something “threatens their religion”. Your religion is your personal commitment with your higher power – not everyone else’s.   Don’t deny someone’s legal rights outside of religion in an attempt protect what you deem is good. 

Thursday, 9 August 2012

US pastor thinks children raised in same-sex marriages need to be kidnapped to "save" them.


                Pursuing a degree in media, specifically Public Relations, nothing much surprises me about people nowadays; saying that, this surprised me. An American pastor, Bryan Fischer, is arguing that children from same-sex households should be kidnapped and an underground railroad set up to “free them.” Fischer likened this practice to being needed as it was to “freeing slaves.”

                I resisted the urge to whack my head off my desk a few times and read through the article to find out as much information as possible. Fischer is a spokesperson for the American Family Association (the same one that Chick-Fil-A*** CEO Dan Cathy stated he supported,) where he is their director of Issue Management. Fischer tweeted, “we need an underground railroad to deliver innocent children.”

                Where does this obviously well thought argument come from? Robert Oscar Lopez apparently posted on a right-wing website blaming growing up in a same-sex household the reason for his lack of social skills, trouble fitting in at work and making it difficult for him to have a relationship with a woman. I’m going to bite my tongue here and say that I highly doubt that that’s the reason he’s decided he’s so flawed as a human being. Yes, upbringing does play a part in the way you are as an adult, but the fact that he’s blaming his moms for the reason he is awkward is absurd. There’s no mention of loving them or thanking for them for raising him, it’s “you’re gay, you made me weird.”

                My views on marriage are very simple: you don’t want gay marriage, don’t get gay married. I am straight; I want to have a traditional wedding in a church. Just because I am making the personal decision to marry a man does not mean that I achieve this divine right to dictate how the rest of the world will get married! It bothers me that people want to inject themselves into the personal lives of everyone else as if we’re all in an episode of Big Brother. Life is reality, not reality TV.  I respect that Mr. Fischer has the right to have an opinion about marriage and how he thinks that upbringing affects children, but when you’re talking about “saving” innocent children as if they’re shackled in a basement in a same-sex couples house, that’s ridiculous. Where there is one man blaming his family structure for his social awkwardness there are millions of other men and women who say it has made them stronger.

                By the very statistics of “traditional” marriage you can attest it can be just as harmful to a child. Most marriages end in divorce, that’s a fact. I’m not saying that marriage between a man and a woman is flawed for that reason but you can’t look at “traditional” marriage as this completely flawless sentient being, it never has been. Marriages are incorporate individuals, who are just that, individual. The negatives that are being created is the shame that is being dumped on same-sex family children by these extreme religious groups, stating they’re “doing it for their own good.” You can’t teach a child to hate his/her parent because their lifestyle is different than yours, nor should you shame them into a corner because that’s how they’re growing up. Children are impressionable, as kids we just want to fit in; whether it’s having the newest toys or wearing the coolest clothes; we want acceptance. Creating these ignorant little boxes where “family” needs to fit in corrupts the very nature of a family.

                It shouldn’t need to be this overstated but every person has the right to the lifestyle they choose. Mr. Fischer has the right to think marriage is between a man and a woman only just as much as I have to the right to think people can marry who they want. A family is a complex being, it doesn’t live and breathe in black and white; family is whatever you feel it is. Hold onto your beliefs and keep them close, but don’t be so ignorant as to ram them down the throats of anyone who thinks a little differently.



Article and quotes were taken from the Sun News article “US pastor advocates abducting children from gay homes” by QMI Agency


Bryan Fischer’s Twitter can be found here:



***Note: Chick-Fil-A has not had any direct correlation to Mr. Fischer's position or comments, they are at this point, unrelated instances.